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phoneus: phoneus: mkultra: WHY WOULD PORN BLOGS FOLLOW ME I’M LITERALLY KIN WITH A POPE best sentence so far of 2017 going to print this out and find an elderly Lebanese woman to explain it to

I am pleased to report that the day after Walgreens has pissed me off and summarily lost my business, the new CVS they built right next to my workplace has literally just openedBye, motherfuckers

kaseysellingseashells: queerwashing: if you give me a task with no deadline i will literally never do it but if you give me a deadline i will get it done exactly 1 hour before the deadline even if the deadline is in six years

Seeing the boy I loved completely replace me for someone who lives all the way in fucking Sweden that he’s never met irl when I literally live right down the street ABSOLUTELY FUCKING INFURIATES ME. I hate that he’s happy with her. That should

This is literally me when I invite a new guy to join our Xbox group that I flirt with (knowing nothing can happen between us) and everyone either starts confessing their love for him, me, or both of us out of fucking nowhere. Wtf

titlefightclub: fucking @ me

The universe is constantly fucking reminding me how forever alone I am. I’m seeing couples literally e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e

beyonslayed: *random bad thing happens to me* Me: homophobia never sleeps I see…

And I'm so fucking beautiful I can't stand it

deafmic: i love mic so fucking much

basiacat: when ur thirsty for fic but you have quite fucking literally read every single quality fanfiction for the pairing

clear is literally a fully functional humanoid robot and you’re fucking telling me he can’t at least draw a decent map. “scary dogs” are you fucking serious you adorable piece of shit robot.

themochagoddess: jamesyouth: toinfinityandbeyonce: when you havin pho for christmas dinner Fuck this is so positive and I love it THIS IS SO CUTE

Every god fucking damn time I read shimadacest fanfics

i’m literally so stressed rn all i can do is reblog shitposts i want to die

tied-tease:Me on this blog: I JUST WANNA GET FUCKING POUNDEDMe irl: If you kiss me or hold my hand I will cry from affection

altraya: I’M FUCKING CRYING IT’S HERE FULL METAL PANIC YES FINALLY WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOREVER IT’S FINALLY FUCKING HAPPENING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bipolar-berry-crunch: you-st0le: This is my entire life FUCK

taylor-tut: n-yks: balenciaguhh: cobaltdays: why they gotta do luigia like this :( “Luigia” Mario’s lost sister luigia. this post is a fucking disaster

naomijcho: exyurockfan69: this is fucking awesome:P haha. i hate when my ass is in the way!

little–kitten-princess: starrimmedglasses: daddys-rainbow-princess: I’M BEING A BRAT BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO DISCIPLINE ME AND GIVE ME TIME OUTS AND TALK TO ME IN A STERN VOICE AND SPANK ME. WHY IS THAT NOT CLEAR? Holy fuck. Literally me.

momjoon: *lowkey loves you for the rest of my entire fucking life

*Acts innocent but is thinking about riding the fuck out of you*

vnelz: I’m the type of girlfriend who always just wants to annoy you like let me hold your fucking hand and let me just hug your back and put my head under your shirt or bite your shoulder or bite your nose or hug your head or some shit idk i love

methodguy: literally me rn

d4mnafrica: literally me

freshprinceprs:somewherinneverland:rainashizas: meloetta: stage 1 of friendship: what’s up ily so much! stage 2 of friendship: oh god i hope i’m not being too clingy or bothering them stage 3 of friendship: hey dickhead fucking answer me Stage

weloveshortvideos: literally me

weloveshortvideos: literally me

hate: is it bad that i secretly want to be hit by a car all the time

mothurs: me: i love living!!!me, one second later: anyway i’ve been thinking and life is really hard and i want to Die™

me-and-my-beard: weloveshortvideos: literally me i missed it

bigdumbcutefaces: ladyjaneparker: Literally me petting me friends’ cats. me, all the time with zelda

savodraws: Sometimes I’m just a really shy muffin

mangachaa: *watches entire anime without knowing anybodys names*

cinnabongene: me, the entire day: oh my god i’m so tired, i can’t wait to go to back to sleep me, at 3 AM:

bran-draws-things: How to be an artist AND enjoy your other interests

suhojpg: *wants to read* *doesnt read* *wants to draw* *doesnt draw* *wants to study a language* *doesnt study the language* *wants to watch new movies* *doesnt watch new movies* *wants to do stuff i like and enjoy* *doesnt*

osirisingold: trinathewolf: kyleehenke: its the simple things in life unmute this holy shit If I showed my girlfriend this our baby would be out and we could leave the hospital , I almost pissed lol

cutegirlonline: me, sitting in my bed, in pjs: *is anxious* me: wtf. why

thatsthat24: pistachiolyon: thomas-sanders-with-vine: Nighttime Struggles 🌙 THIS IS LITERALLY ME RIGHT NOW! This is also quite literally me right now.

shellycrossing: doenymphette: *plays animal crossing every day nonstop for 9 months* *forgets to play for 1 day* *doesn’t play for 2 years* literally me

arfie: Literally me

traitor: sigh i really feel like some of my best work just goes unnoticed

niambi: teamnowalls: localstarboy: Being drunk vs Being high i saw this on twitter and i cant stop thinking about it cuz its literally mania vs depression #it’s funny cuz they are both going through it

azaya: Literally me

weaksorry: me: *still has feelings after waking up* me: what the fuck

dumbgay: i may be a terrible person but at least i say please and thank you and use my fucking blinker

manda: fauxxpale: i should get off the internet i’m sorry i wrote this fuck me literally me

hamhammyham: Boy im interested in who is interested in me: *likes another girls selfie* Me: oh u want to play games? *fucks someone else*

laddersoftherain: queermagicalgirls: condesces: i find my cosmic insignificance reassuring the stars don’t fucking care who i am or what i do i owe the universe nothing i exist on my own terms #the galaxy dont care that u messed up the thing that

ruinedchildhood: bruises-for-tomorrow: when your life is falling apart but you don’t give a fuck anymore

luciferofficial: having a violence kink is the best thing because it’s like. someone wants to punch me in the face?? beat the shit out of me???? haha joke’s on them now their hand hurts and i have a boner

kokoro4kakashi: Year is 2547child: i can’t sleeeeepmother: awww, i’ll sing you this ancient lullaby that my mother taught me, and her mother taught her…[cuddles]mother: WEEEE AAAARE FIGHTING DREAMERS! TAKAMI WO MEZASHITE!

telapathetic: sorry teacher I cant do my homework because I don’t fucking give a shit

pome-garnet: *sees blue and red things* RUBY AND SAPPHIRE RUBY AND SAPPHIRE RUBY AND SAPPHIRE RUBY AND SA

lizbid33: Me, watching Incredibles 2, everytime Voyd came on screen: fucking superb you funky little lesbian

frightened: text post rule no punctuation if u need punctuation u can use lots of question marks for emphasis??????? mispell words so people know ur blogging in the gthrows of passion dont spell the as teh though what is this fucking 9gag or some shit

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